If you're anything like me, this phrase brings up memories of Game of Thrones in prep for the white walkers (If you don't or haven't watched GOT please do...even though the last season was a tab bit underwhelming). If one thing in our reality mimics what was on the show, it's the level of anxiety and fear of the unknown that is being experienced by many in 2020. Something that happens to many every winter is seasonal depression and anxiety...hence the title. As a person that has experienced both and overcome most of it ( yeah, I still have my moments of anxiousness), I've learned a few tricks to help me avoid going back down the deep abyss. Of course there are somethings you can't control that impact this emotional experience such as the weather (less sunlight tends to lend towards both anxiety and depression), but what about the things you can control? Most people fail at various things due to a lack of planning. I'm almost certain no one could have fathomed what has taken place over the entirety of 2020 and it's caused havoc on so many people emotionally, mentally, physically, socially, etc. While some have found various outlets to deal with the situation, others have just carried the burden while trying to do life in the new normal. I'm not sure where you fall on the spectrum, but I've never been at this level of peace and being centered before. I have so many people tell me that I don't understand or my situation is completely different, but the truth is that I've worked really hard to deal with my areas of lack in emotional intelligence and being able to appropriately deal with life in a healthy manner. I'm physically interactive 7 days a week because of the desire for a summer body year round as well as the total benefits on health emotionally and mentally. I make certain that I sleep and when I struggle I take a supplement to help make it more restful. I can admit that the one area that I allowed to slack over the past few weeks was my diet and I finally snapped back into "get right" mode because of how I was feeling. I refuse to beat anyone over the head for going through moments of anxiety or experiencing depression because I've been there and it's just tough and it happens to become a cycle. I know what it's like to just want it all to end and that's really why I'm writing this. One of the main reasons I say that I've overcome these two monsters is because I consciously made the decision to NEVER go back down that road. I am aware of my triggers and I recognize when I feel myself starting to become anxious and I take action immediately.
One of the worst things you can do is nothing and just try to overcome with avoidance. Avoiding is a decision and regardless of the time period that all of the "stuff" becomes background noise, you will eventually have to experience the consequences of that decision and it will more than likely feel like an avalanche. As the saying goes: Rome wasn't built in a day, it's necessary to take things one day at a time and/or one circumstance at a time. Sort through everything going on and begin to "trim the fat". Just because you encounter something, it doesn't mean that it is your responsibility nor your job to emotionally carry the burden.This may mean you need to address how you often you view your social media, who you choose to converse with consistently, and/or the level of importance you give things. The holidays are a great time to put this into practice. While I haven't been able to do the traditional gatherings for a few years after our move, I remember having a host of emotions that ranged from excitement of seeing family that I didn't get to see regularly to angst about encountering people that changed personalities like underwear (take that however you will but we all know folks that are like the toys in happy meals because you never know what mood you'll catch them in). In the past, my mood could shift based on those I was around and it was terribly draining. Honestly...my life was like that and I allowed too many others power they didn't deserve. The simple truth is I am responsible for my feelings as well as my responses and once I quit making excuses about what was going on in my life, I was able to figure what I needed to do in order to quit the pendulum of emotions I kept experiencing. If every year at Thanksgiving you leave the gathering emotionally heavy because of some kind of conflict, maybe you should try something different this year. Gasp!!!! I know that you always spend time with your family, but at some point you have to decide if your emotional health is more important than having a plate with a side of chaos. I recognize this isn't something everyone experiences and even if dinner goes perfectly with no issues, if there's underlying tensions you'll eventually feel the effects in your overall mood and bring that back home with you. One of the ways to change some of the cycle is to do something different. Will it be easy, nope...truth is neither is being burdened with anxiety and depression. If you could choose I would hope you'd rather stay home with something tasty from DoorDash or GrubHub or creating a Friendsgiving situation that includes a small select group (Please remember the Pandemic isn't over folks!!) that provides fellowship, food, and fulfillment. Life really is a lot of what you make it.
I recognize that the more serious levels of anxiety and depression require much more than what I mentioned above. I hope that therapy, and medication if necessary, are apart of the plan in progressing towards emotional and mental health. Quite honestly, my personal opinion is that everyone could benefit from counseling/life counseling at some point in life. Having the ability to have a different perspective alongside the addition of skills that if applied could potentially provide the path to better living is a huge positive. Sure you can get some "advice" from friends, but if you're honest many of the people we hang around tend to think like us and basically will tell us things that aren't going to shift our thinking. Work on doing different things to change the outcomes (No...this isn't always going to work) and store up your emotional bank account during the Spring, Summer, and Fall because regardless of your feelings: Winter is Coming.